Someone told me the other day that I seemed like I had it all together. While I would love to believe that this is true....the good Lord knows better.
I have a faith in the Lord that allows me to put a smile on my face and believe whole hearted that he knows all about the reasons why things are the way they are in this life. But I know that one day it isn't going to matter how life was in this world. He gave me all 3 of my children for different reasons.
There are days when I get down and out or super frustrated. Days when I want to look at the people who are staring at us in Wal-Mart when we are struggling and punch them in the face instead of smiling at them like I have no idea why they are looking at us. I have days when I would like to burn Fragile X to the ground if it were possible but it isn't. When I see other children who are Dalton's age and they are able to be in a General education classroom, or able to play sports with their peers, or understand why they have to go to a doctor's office and can tell them what hurts, the sting is still there deep in my heart.
So, I've learned not to dwell on things that are out of my control and focus on things that I can control. I can make sure that get every possible therapy or help that they need. I spread awareness and education every possible opportunity that I have. I advocate for my children when necessary. These are things that I can control while here on this Earth. So I'm determined to do all those to the best of my ability.
The great thing about God is that he doesn't expect us to have it all figured out. He will never leave us nor forsake us. We just have to know that when we can't walk along this path on our own he is there to carry us.
Amazing Grace (My Chains are Gone)